Why blog about hell

I want my first post to be a little about me and why I am writing this blog.

Goal: Through sharing my experiences of "Effexor Discontinuation Syndrome" and comments of support or questions on the site, I am hoping to get through this.

I have been on Effexor XR for 5 years. I started at 150mg, and jumped last summer to 225mg. Over the course of the past year I have tapered successfully down to 75 mg, without horrible effects, and have attempted unsuccessfully twice to get off the drug.

Last week, after a plague of bad health culminating in over a dozen blood tests and doctors throwing around words like cancer, lupus, auto-immune, but with no abnormal test results... I have decided (after much research) that the most likely cause is this damned drug.

I am a young female engineer, and recently married. My husband I would like to start our family soon, which is by far my largest motivation for getting off this stuff. The marriage and a small amount of counseling has gotten my major depression under control. A new job has seriously lowered my stress level enough to not need the pills. Now I just have to get through the end of the road and be free...

I want to list some of my "on-drug" symptoms they we are fairly sure is attributed to the effexor, so that if any others are concerned about the same things, they may know where they are coming from - I will try and continue blogging after getting off of effexor to ensure a record of if these symptoms did disapreer.

1) Itching - rashes: For the entirety of my effexor tenure, every night, like clockwork - itching in my legs and back side. These sometimes manifest into rash and petechiael bruising under the skin, and have worsened over time. The is exacerbated by a hot shower or bath.

2) Weight Gain: When I started on effexor, I was 5'10" and 160 lbs. Very health, and 19 years old. I exercise mild-to-moderately daily, for 30-90 minutes. I eat fairly healthy (but who can resist McD's fries? occasionally) and come from a very tall slender family. I am now 210 lbs. I will also put out there that this may be combined with effects from my birth control. I can diet, exercise constantly, and while I gain muscle tone, I do not lose a pound. My husband has tracked my eating and exercising with me (just because I thought I was going insane) and has seen the same.

3) Weakened Immune system: Over the past 2 years in particular - (raised dosages and discontinuation attempts) my Immune system has gone to crap. 4 ER visits with severe Influenza (yes I got the flu shot!), broncitus, and "sinus infections" every month like clock-work. I wash my hands, sit in a cube or office with a HEPA filter, spray antibacterial spray religiously... no dice. I had so much missed time in my last job that they considered getting rid of me at one point. I made up the time on my weekends and evenings, which only made me more sick. I have spent hundreds on antibiotics and still felt 60 years old. (Just for anyone counting, I turn 24 this week). Not only that, every bug that went around work, I would get without fail, and would have for twice as long.

4) False Positives (hopefully) on Allergy Tests: My research shows that this is an effexor peculiarity and I plan on checking these results about 6-8 months after being effexor free. Because of #3, we did allergy tests to try and find the immune weakener. I showed up as allergic to all meats. Yes, all of them, beef, pork, poultry, fish, and crustaceans. Now, if I really was allergic to something common in all of those, I would be allergic to myself... (Humans are mammals after all, and have common protein strands with all of the above). I have eaten meat all of my life, and under doctor suggestion, became a strict vegetarian. (Not easy for someone with mild anemia who lives in Colorado - where you need good blood to breath). After 5 months of being a vegetarian, my IBS symptoms that were 'cured' have returned, and all it seems to have changed with respect to everything else is that I am now more than mildly anemic and Iron deficient.

5) IBS - worsened the entirety of my effexor tenure. Only kept in check by daily DanActive yogurts and ... well it is really not in check.

So, after all of that I have embarked on this hellish journey to get off this drug. Yes it helped the depression, but what good does that do me if I can't get off without hurting myself?